Months in care: 30 (I cannot count the days… it hurts my heart too much)
Number of CASAs: 2 (one fantastic, one not-at-all fantastic)
Number of days lost from work because of sudden arrivals/removals from my home: about 8 (not including the FMLA leave I chose to take during the first two months)
Number of days lost from work because of court hearings that didn’t happen when/where I was informed they would: 3
Number of court hearings and other official meetings that I “accidentally” didn’t get notification about: 3
Child’s social workers: 5
Number of times I dropped the f bomb on child’s social worker (without children present): 1
Number of times dropping the f bomb on social worker got me what I wanted: 1
Supervisors: 2
Number of times I pestered supervisors because I didn’t like social workers’ answers: too many to count
Big Bosses: 2
Number of times I called in the big boss because I didn’t like supervisors’ answers: 2
Number of times calling in the big boss got me what I wanted: 1
Number of times the big boss told me emphatically to wait in the lobby and not come upstairs to his office: 1
Number of times I threatened to appeal a decision that actually had to do with me (most decisions in foster care don’t): 1
Number of times that threatening to appeal got me what I wanted: 0.5 (they met me halfway on this one)
Number of times I was late arriving for a required visit: 1
Number of times a professional was late or didn’t show for a required visit: 50? 100? These are actual estimates.
Number of times I would do it again: all of them. Because Little One is worth it. All of the little ones are worth it.
(To be fair, not all adoptions are like this. My daughter’s adoption involved only one social worker and no f bombs.)